Shattered Love

I held the hand that wasn't there.
I felt the relief when you left.
Time heals all wounds, for a while
I didn't care. That 'while' still
remains, the heart is cold...
I am no longer there. You are no
longer here, I no longer stare
at the photo that once stood upon
the shelf. I no longer smell your
sweet perfume, wipe the remains of
the lost love. Re heat the menu..
to feel your skin, to lie beside
you, crumpled sheets where we once
lay, battered pillows of friendly play.
The crowd do gather, it's cold out
side, once again you are by my side.
The mourners gather, the rain clouds
form. My tears have dried, they no
longer fall. I'm frozen, shaking..
cold. My blood stained skin...
where the thorns has pierced me
within, the love that abandoned me.
Cast aside this red rose, down to the
sodden earth below. Dark is where you
belong, from where you shall lay..
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust....
from my hands the roses fall.
And I shall walk away.

One Vision

Reach out.
Reach out and touch me,
I can feel your pain..
I can feel your sorrow,
let me share.....
all your tomorrows.
Let me hold your heart
in the palm of my hand.
We can do this...
you just have to try.
Try to understand,
from my side of you eyes
how much I love you,
how much I've cried.
I'm doing my best, it's
hard but I'm getting
there. Time is all I have,
I want to spend it all
with you. There's no
where else I want to be.
To wake up beside you,
to kiss you in the rain...
I want to take you in my
arms, never looking back.
Our future holds so many
memories, we have to do
this, it's our destiny.
Come hold me, come kiss
me in the rain. Let me be
your end, until the stars
go out, until the world is
no more, I am here for
you, don't ever forget.

Time to catch up

Hi every one I've just got back about an hour ago from my holiday, in Whitby North Yorkshire. I am intact ... er ... apart from my beast of a bike!! I managed to almost do a wheelie, but I wasn't trying to. I managed to pull my left leg, it's OK, and add a few more scratches to my paint work!! Shit, Bugger, Bollocks! To name but a few words that passed my lips at the time of falling off the bloody thing! I have suffered with a swollen knee for three days prior to the accident. I will get to the point of replying to Spike's blog and replying to the award that she most generously gave me before I went away. I am looking forward to sleeping in my own bed tonight and having a lovely cup of tea, made by yours' truly! I haven't had time to read all 59 E mails yet. I love getting away from the real world, pigging out, drinking ample booze and falling asleep at any given moment, obviously not whilst on my bike. I can fall of that whilst it's pretty much stationary! I love to listen to the screeching seagulls, but not at 3a.m. The weather was kind on the journey up and nice and sunny on the afternoon of the Wednesday as I arrived. The weather turned nasty for pretty much the remainder of the holiday, apart from Saturday when I went on my bike to Newcastle...Geordie land!! I had an interesting conversation with a local man in the town, I asked for directions and he in his native tongue replied ' ya go down ther'... sorry but I can't remember what else he said, I tried to keep a straight face and concentrate on the details he was giving me, afterwards I thanked him and immediately got lost! The only problem with holidays is, they soon end and we have to return to the real world..... WORK!! ARRGHHHHHHH!!!! I will be back at my boring job on Tuesday, what fun. I haven't written anything since I've been away, I have rested my brain, totally chilled out.. ( rain saw to that ) and had fabulous rides on Black Thunder, the scratches are tiny and all part of a learning process
at of how not to fall of it. Thankfully I wasn't going to fast t the time otherwise I might not be here typing these words to you.

Push the limits

Weather plays a big part in running. Today was overcast. I prepared myself for my journey, planned my route. Got dressed, did my usual stretching exercises, opened the door...to find.... it's raining! Oh well here goes nothing and off I went down the road. I'd had a stressful half hour previous, trying to get the computer to play some music and my temper had got the better of me, I was shaking I was so mad! My neck hurt, I'd had heart burn for most of the morning... brilliant conditions for running in. Once I had convinced myself that I'd soon start to feel the benefits and calm down, I did just that. I can remember all those years ago when I'd drudge round the country lanes, that once I'd got my breathing sorted, my mind became relaxed and I actually enjoyed it, even though my legs hurt, my feet throbbed, I did actually get a great feeling of satisfaction out of it. I haven't been out since last Wednesday and was itching to get out there again otherwise the few days work that I had done would've been for nothing. I surprised myself today and as a result I'm planning on another big run tomorrow, wet or otherwise. Since my decision a few weeks ago to run for cancer, I'd only actually been going a short distance, building up my stamina. Today I pushed myself further. I went to the roundabout and back, which is roughly one and a half miles, my breathing eased, my bad neck recovered, I felt great. A fantastic energy boost and a feeling of total euphoria rushed through my entire body, I was shaking by the time I had returned home. OK I'm hooked now. So regardless of the weather, once I've ventured outside come rain or shine I'm buzzing. Each day I will push the limits until I know no boundaries. My legs still ache, but it's a good ache, my appetite has grown also.

No Pain no gain.

Well, the weather has taken a turn for the worst. Gale force winds have been battering the coast line and other parts of the country for the past few days, not to mention the severe rain, tidal waves too. Not the kind of conditions to be running in but beggars can't be choosers, as they say ( who ever 'they' are?). I do the usual stretches before I go out, take one final glance at my watch and venture out into the unknown. The first time I went out on Sunday just gone, my lungs absolutely caned. I knew this would happen as I used to an athlete twelve years ago, running on a regular basis. I also know that what I'm aiming to achieve will not happen over night. Rome was not built in a day ( took all of a week to build!) Yeah right Lol. What I have noticed is that my appetite has grown, wanting more carbs to boost my energy levels. I can recall how fit I was twelve years ago and how heavy I weighed, 11.5 stone but it was mostly muscle. But with fitness comes injuries, the body becomes so finely tuned, demanding regimes.. and I look at myself at the present moment in time and just laugh...BUT with care and attention given to detail, regular running, building my strength up, I will return to the woman I was all those years ago, maybe not as toned but it's coming, I can feel it in my bones, or is that just the feeling of being totally knackered?.. I think not. Watch this space people, and I'll continue to put in the hard work, come what may the weather conditions. I will deliver, I will continue to get money for this just cause... and as the saying goes...'no pain.. no gain.'