Thursday 15 November 2012

Time on my hands

I was bragging last week that I'd only had 2 days off sick this year and that was due to Cortie/steroid injection into my right thumb. Last  weekend we went to south Wales for a long weekend. We stay at this amazing B&B... well I don't know about you but when I visit some one else's house I think it only good manners to remove your foot wear! So I did... after several cups of tea, I made my way through the hall way to use the toilet.... what happened next almost brought me to tears. The hall way is carpeted some of the way .. the rest of the way is beautiful welsh stone flag flooring...not totally lever, not kind to toes when stubbing them. I spent the whole journey home with my right fourth toe bleeding and throbbing. The next day I hobbled to work...spent 15 minutes there then hobbled back to the car...spent 20 minutes in the doctors surgery... and 3 hours in A&E at our local hospital! X ray shows it isn't broken but the bruising is painful... the toe upon impact must have lifted of the fleshy part and...well as you can see from the photo.... I'm now off work due to not having a shoe fit to wear for work..... oh and the pain. I will also at some point in the not so distant future lose my toe nail. So what am I doing with all this spare time on my hands? Putting it to good use.... see below¬
 
These are made souly by me. The necklace & bracelet sets retail at £20.00, bracelets on their own retail at £7.50..necklaces at £12.50. I can separate but I normally make the set. I have a pay pal account.. price for P&P is an additional £1.50.  I can make to order but I never use the same beads as I prefer to make unique Jewellery using different beads, however should anyone require a certain colour or length then I can adapt.
 

Monday 15 October 2012

Angel Eyes



On Saturday just gone I was out enjoying the good weather with my husband, we were on our motorbikes. On our way to a place called Lichfield which consists of riding on a long road for
several miles... a dual carriage way., two lanes up and on the other side two lanes down.
Prior to trying to get on the the dual carriage way, down the slip road which under most normal
circumstances is fairly easy. Saturday was a day when I realised I must have had a gaurdian angel
looking over me. We have blue tooth devices on our helmets so we can communicate with each other
while riding. I'd left the traffic lights after they had green, made great head way in front and away from traffic behind me.  My other half shouted to me 'watch out for that car, it's right behind you!'
At that point I checked my left side and the car was so close it was a miracle I wasn't by this point under her wheels and in big trouble.  I calmly checked my right shoulder.... hit the indicator moved over into the right hand lane... at which point my husband has lost eye contact with me, assuming the worst!! She only followed me into the right had lane. By the time I'd manouvered my bike to where I thought I'd be safe, she had over taken me...driven like some crazed mad woman past me over taken me then without checking for on coming traffic ..proceeded to crossover two lanes into the right hand lane....still driving like some dickhead.... I have gotten over my  dice with near death... it's a good job I stayed calm other wise I dread to think what might have happened! Phew!! Sunday I went into post traffic stress dissorder...... thankful it didn't boil over into something tragic. I was tempted to follow the driver and find out who she was...report her for dangerous driving.... on the other hand...best not to have done that, I would most likely have lost my temper and smacked her one.

Tuesday 9 October 2012

'Ta dah'




 I made these little beauties over the weekend. For a friend at work who is getting married this Friday.

I have excelled my talents once again, but it isn't always about the exchange of money that gives me

the joy of making such items. When people say 'thank you' and 'WOW' my friend on face book

wrote 'Stunning.. and once again thank you    'this is what counts, it's nice to be appreciated some

times in life and in what we do. I had a big smile on my face all day yesterday due to my friends

response. She will be getting wed the Friday some where in Wales, I hope the sun shines for her

on that day, and forever in her newly married life. 

Monday 24 September 2012

Made by me

   FOR   SALE .....  red heart shaped glass beads on a black leather string.

£7.99.... I have a paypal account. Any offers... I shall be making more jewellery so watch out.



Wednesday 5 September 2012

Stunning

Whitby ~ our piece of heaven.
Roads built for speed, views
full of colour..seaguls scream.
Three days of sunny bliss..
ice cream-fish n chips.
Walks on the beach..
shops selling days gone by
sticky sweets. Jet jewellry,
amber too.. rock pools
searching for crabs.
Magpie cafe.. pots
of Yorkshire tea..
squid soup, mushy peas.
 Top of the hill, many steps
 climb, time to stand still,
 take a breath..admire the
 the stunning views.


Friday 31 August 2012

Awol..

Am off now,
for a couple
of days n
nights, just
me n him
on our
bikes.
Lie ins
fresh air,
with him
at my side,
and me in
his arms.
Walks by
the sea, with
hopefully
sunshine
thrown in
for free.
We need
a break,
a few
days by
the sea..
to celebrate
our
wedding
anniversary.

Tuesday 28 August 2012

Sunday 26 August 2012

Indi~ Shit helps roses to grow

Indi: Shit helps roses to grow: This used to be a blog where I could down load shit that was appearing in my mind. Shit in large quantities, unknown amounts would just app...

Friday 24 August 2012

Sunday 12 August 2012

Ramblings

I am now the proud owner of a brand new lap top. My previous model fell fowl to old age, over use and finally death! Today I collected my new Samsung notebook. It's handy size..was half price which I wouldn't have paid over £500 for but got this for just under £300...in my eyes that's known as a bargain!! Got the whole package deal too.. Norton.. insurance etc. Just getting used to the new layout of it but it's not difficult to use really... and when I've figured it out can down load photos off my 'Samsung' phone on to my 'Samsung' notebook! It's all exciting stuff. Now down to other stuff..
 The house is coming along slowly but surely. I call the place where we live, my own peice of Canada, having visited Manitoba twice.. the ultimate peace n quiet they have around them, due to the vastnessof open space...I love it here. My neighbours have chickens so I get an abundance of fresh eggs on a regular basis... Life in general is coming up roses...of which I have abunch of pink one's in a vase on my kitchen window. Bliss is what I call my life right now....  I have no room for fuck wits, half wits or just bog standed twits... I've come along way in thepast 12-18 months,  ramblings here n there, don't do the guilt thing no more.. me n my man are happy doing what we want to do. And I've never lived in a more idilic place than here, green fields all around, trees up to the clouds... Blue sky inbetween rain, lets go dancing naked in the rain...I'm sure there's a song in there some where..if any one out there can give me the song and title? Guess I'm all out of ramblings for now.Adios for now..

Mwuah  Indi


xoxoxoxo

Monday 6 August 2012

Max

On Saturday  we took our dog 'Max' to the vets as he had gone off his legs.
It wasn't looking good either as they told us this n that..what it might be or
could be. We left in their capable hands. Sunday wasn't good either. He wasn't
responding to the drugs and still hadn't shown any real signs of getting
better. Today I phoned the vets at 8.30 to see how he was doing!
I left work immediately in a tearful panic. Max had gone down hill so quick
it was better to let him go now rather than later. I left a ruffled message
with the dept... eyes already red n swollen, tears streaming down my
face, chin low to avoid questions from passing work folk.
I drove like an idiot to the vets. I was informed that Max had
been given a sedative to calm him down. Apparently he'd also
gone blind so couldn't see me, but as the nice young vet opened
the cage, I immediately lay down stroking Max's head and telling
we loved him and he's going to feel some peace. I kissed him
goodbye and cried................................
The good vet then administered the lethal cocktail of drugs
into the intravenous drip and Max pain free went to sleep.



Rest in Peace Max, we love you

Sunday 5 August 2012

Thunder

  

                                   Don't wish the storm to pass.....


                                         Learn to dance in the rain.

Monday 30 July 2012

Died

Yesterday I found some proper powdered milk that very young animals can have, including kittens.
So I went out a bought a dropper so I could feed 'Jet' as he/she wasn't old enough to lap milk. I
fed him/her? before I went to work this morning.... litter tray training was due to start today, I wrapped little sweetie pie in towel for warmth and went to work, placed kitty in box with teddy so he/she didn't feel alone. I have cried so much since I returned home. 'Jet' has died. I think because of the age of my kitten he/she couldn't maybe digest  the food. I didn't yet know  the sex of my kitty... a beautiful kitten with plenty of love to give and
a lot of love n kisses given in return.
I shall dig a grave and put 'Jet' in a shaded area in the garden.

Saturday 28 July 2012

Saved

Yesterday I saved a life.
I gave a pint of blood.
Today I saved a life..
tiny black long haired
kitten, who had lost it's
mummy. Skinny n cold
not very old. Long
haired adorable little
kitty.. blue eyes too.
Jet we have named him
due to the colour of
the fur, I say 'he'
because he/she is too
young to decide
what sex it is..
We now have two
dogs, two cats,
two bikes-push,
two motorbikes-
rush. A car -mine
a bright green van-
his. Family now
complete.

Thursday 26 July 2012

'For Sale.'

White and lacy... clean. One lady owner!
I said a few meaningful words to which
I still hold deep in my heart... one clean
white, used only once, low mileage..
wedding dress .size 12. Any offers?
I tried it on the other night.. I was just
9 stone when I got hitched .. all those
wonderful years ago... I held my breath
climbed in and zipped myself in....
couldn't breathe out but I got into it.
I don't have a photo as yet, but when
I eventually get my brand new lap top
I'll down load the pictures, from my
mobile phone.

Thursday 19 July 2012

'Crash n burn'.

Well the good news is, I can still type! The not so good news is I now have to use my other half's laptop as I think mine has at long last snuffed it! So here I am again... off work! Our new home is coming along very well... although today and tomorrow I'm not allowed to use my right hand due too having cortisone injections directly into the thumb joint...."ouch....cringe & gritting of teeth|" were my first reactions! Followed by sharp intake of breath!!!
I've been having trouble with my right thumb for some time  now. After referrals to X-ray dept; then for Ultrasound... I was then referred to see the orthopaedic surgeon yesterday. As I assumed I would be having a chat as to what the prognosis was and how to combat the discomfort. Or in my words... 'Oh sh*t, what now?' Read and sign consent form. A quick wipe of the area ... this is the part where I closed my eyes, gritted my teeth...and felt the fine long sharp needle disappear into the joint of my thumb. (Not a nice feeling)! So what is the prognosis eh? The knuckle is riddled with Arthritis and very swollen. I have to admit I wasn't looking forward to any of this....AND if the injections don't work, the swelling doesn't reduce completely then I'm afraid the next step is surgery! That's what the large irregular lump is, swelling of the joint.
 So I'm stuck at home now until next Monday, when I have, I hope some kind of use in my thumb. Until then I don't get to do much of anything..... easy I hear you all say. Time to relax?! BORING! I went out on my m'bike yesterday a.m, hope this procedure works...biking annoys the pain BIG time,I'm not quitting riding... so it'd better work. The weather doesn't change much either.....rain! Rain! and even more bloody RAIN!!!!!

Tuesday 3 July 2012

Last Respects

I have the day off tomorrow.

Time to remember.... pay

our  last respects....

Say our goodbyes... cry.

I think tomorrow as we

bury Uncle John..

what with the last

few weeks.. being

so busy, then also

losing Burt.. I

got a feeling

I might shed

some much

needed tears

tomorrow..

long time

coming, tissues

at the ready,

just in case.

Time to

reflect..

sing Psalm

23... bow

our heads..

Give hugs..

what do I

say?

All gathered

in.. raise you

glass, sniffle.

Another

day closes.

Another

day begins.

Sunday 1 July 2012

R.I.P Burt


This is Burt.
He was a
amazingly
funny..
strong..
generous..
Father.
Grandaddy.
Cousin..
Friend..
Brother..
Uncle
I shall miss him.
The family are
coping.. once
you met him..
you felt like
you'd known
him for a long
time. I had the
opportunity to
meet him,
befriend him.
Admire his
untold strength.
His laugh, his
quirky ways.
The size of
his heart toward
his loving family.
His abundance
of friends.. his
generosity..
He passed
away last
week.. at
his home
with his
family there
beside him.
I am saddened
by his passing.
He had come
through four
operations for
Anurysims..
only to be told
he now had
Cancer.. which
through the months
had taken grip
of him... Chemo
made him throw
up. Painkillers
didn't do a great
deal.. then the
pain went.
The last three
days weren't
easy for him,
he bacame
restless. 3:30pm
on the Tuesday..
he died. I love
you Burt, as I
love all your
family. R.I.P
Burt, rest now.
The pain for
you has gone.
You will never
be out of our
hearts, as for
the family...
the pain has
just begun.

Thursday 28 June 2012

New beginnings

Old time.. new walls
happy memories..
some not so...

Time is a healer.
New beginnings.
New garden..
back yard..
green green
grass of our
new home.

Time to reflect
time to move on
leavin all the
bad ones in
the past. Move
forward.. I have.
New bricks..
no more drafts.
Green fields
in every
direction.
A colour scheme
with love.. boxes
in every position.
Naked walls..
strip wash due
to soon to be
completed
bathroom..
lino on the
kitchen floor.
The view is
out of this
world. No
one but him
and me.. this
is heaven.
Roses above the
front door. Holly
hedge with
whisps of honey-
suckle..sweetly
contented...
and yes....
happy
once
more.

Saturday 19 May 2012

Adios....... for now

As of next Tuesday we end our contract with the company which we have had to provide the Internet. We have cruised several other company's and deals, we have chosen a company and a very good deal. But until we actually get it up and running at our next home.... we will no longer have access to the Internet. So until further notice..Adios for now. Stay safe out there... it's a crap world...but whilst we're here we may as well fuckin party!

Saturday 12 May 2012

Paradise and beyond

White sand...
naked flesh.
Thunder storm
heavy.. wet.
Heavenly
flesh, ripe.
blistering
heat.. ruffled
cotton sheets.
Sun burnt
flesh.. muscles
weak.

Sunday 8 April 2012

Closed

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


CLOSED!

UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE...

Due to moving house/holiday.

Lack of internet connection..

Don't miss me.. I will be back

some time whenever~

whatever & however

I feel like making an

appearance.

With love ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Indi.

Monday 2 April 2012

Once upon a times

You may be out of reach...touch...we don't, we didn't see eye to eye...
I spat my dummy out called you names...names we won't mention.
I often wonder where we might be now had we not fallen out of love.
Have I made a huge mistake, could we ever try again? I've tried so
many times to see where we/I went wrong. But stubborn as I know
I can be/ have been... I don't have the answers any more. I don't
want your pity... I can't be sorry... I won't apologise..what could
I say that would mean it? I have to let go. Cut the last remaining
thread that held us together... severe the lost feelings.. lose all of
the friendship stuff we shared.... I said I didn't care..... this is so
hard to digest. Folded toilet paper..hidden gems... flowers thrust
in your direction.... nerves flinch, hands shake... write me a letter
with words dipped in gold.... what was I thinking back then? Holy
crap I really must have looked a fool. Erase all that I ever said, I
couldn't have been thinking right... and now..................... we are
dead. Dead from the neck down, my heart that once held you
so tightly... shudders each time I almost....
find myself wondering where we might be now if I hadn't told
you how I felt back then..... now I feel nothing... my every things
have perished.... my heart holds no space for 'once upon a times.'

Thursday 29 March 2012

New Horizons













I've spent the last few months trying to convince myself that the time has come to move out of our home, move a couple of miles up the road into our next home. It's a strange feeling because I know that this has been on the cards since we got married, since we moved in here, since that day...knowing that the house came as a part of the job...no job=no home. We also knew it was coming...just feels like it's crept up on us and is out of the blue smacked us in the face! I know that a home is where the heart is and it's what you put into it that gives it the warmth, colour.... love is home. As for our babies that grew up in this house of 26 years +... they now have to go that extra step further, of which they appear to coping with better than I have been doing. Sleepless nights, waking up at 3 in the morning and not able to fall back to sleep. We have the key to our next project (house!) It needs my touch, our touch.. paint by the pots, but it's smaller.. double glazed windows, less money on fuel bills... food for thought. Not a fortune to spent on food, just for me and him... one cat ~tigs~ two dogs outside. A large garden out back surrounded by utter peace n quiet. No irritating neighbours to piss me off. We have boxes to strewn about the house, bubble wrap is a weird thing but protects the fragile things in life, maybe I should wrap myself in bubble wrap...?! So there you have it. The young ones move out next Tuesday... they are sharing a two bedroomed house not far from here, close enough for son to get to work.... on time is another matter. I think they are in for a shock when it comes to house work, who does what... it won't be me anymore! So the emotions will roll next week... a new horizon for us all.





















Monday 12 March 2012

Deformed joint

After every attempt to cause less pain on my right thumb joint, taken countless pills, anti this anti that's, creams, gels, glucosamin this n that's. One year ago I went to my doctors to seek advice,. I have an X-ray.. all appeared well. This weekend past I suffered a thumb pain like no other. The actual joint that attaches the thumb to the hand swelled to such a size I couldn't bend it, the pain was unreal. So my hubby suggested I go see the doctor again to get some thing sorted. Today I went to the doctor, told him I'd got Arthritis in my thumb joint, the pain when it strikes is unbearable.. I can't use it.. which is kind of awkward because even though I'm ambidextrous and use my left hand when I can, I still make a better job of things with my right hand. So anyway the doctor toady is sending me for yet another x ray to see if there's any development.. also I might get to see the hand specialist at our local hospital, that would be The Queen's Hospital. So there might be hope for my thumb.... I might get the 'thumbs up!'

Saturday 10 March 2012

A minor detail

Today was a good day in more ways than one.
After a spin out on my motorbike, first time in two
weeks... weather conditions just right. I went with
my hubby to our soon to be new home, well June
but it isn't far away really. I had mentioned to
him that I wanted to take my piano with me so
we measured its length and width and with tape
measure in pocket went to our new home to be.
I placed the tape measure along the wall in the
to be dining room, yep it fitted so now all we have
to do is sell the table and find a smaller table we
have 'cuz the piano will fit but not with the dining
table in the same area!
But I'm just delighted we have found some where
and I can play my piano for ever and a day.... ;).

Monday 5 March 2012

Time to say goodbye !



Today we found out when we have to pack up and go....

and it's sooner rather than later.

So we have a lot of organising to sort out, furniture to

sell, antiques to sell... a skip to fill... a piano to say my

goodbyes to. I also have a three tier electric organ to

find another home for. Plans to come to the fore..

shades of paint to find, ideas running around inside

my head. More sleepless nights... kids will move

out too, no more fights... time to reflect on years

gone by. No more nasty smells from the adopted

cat she bought home.. he's a lovely cat, but not for

my kitty, he doesn't like him either...meow..scream.


~


So come the first week in June we will move our

gear, take time to arrange our new home.. move

the chairs around.. create the lighting. So many

things to do.. where to start, it's still a bit of a blur.

Time to move, to make a new home, pictures on

walls, smiles of photos past and present.. new

photos to take, new smiles to make, time to

say goodbye. Time to say hello to our next new

home.

Sunday 4 March 2012

Game ~ set ~ match



OK so now I've had a ticking off by my daughter last week, I have had time to re think my strategy. When you hear the words.. similar to I'm the worst mother and where on earth have I got these mothering tactics from?! I have to admit I had a problem with keeping a straight face when she lost the plot, I mean...yeah.. I'd be some what pissed off if my mother told me I was going to lose the roof over my head, as she and her brother are going to be in the same predicament when we eventually move. To be honest I'm looking forward to not having them live with us forever... and after mentioning that when me n their dad are in our old croaking age, dribbling and living in adult size nappies... they kind of decided to go look for some where now. Aha... I got them right where I wanted them.... I mean I've worked in a nursing home many moons ago... I'm not cut out for it... I admire the people who do these jobs. So they now have to go look for some where to live. Sharing is their idea... two rooms of course. My darling daughter wasn't talking to me for a while... no problem there then. I took a look at the way she treats me and for once put myself in her shoes. Took a look at this situation from another side. I had a chat with her yesterday, told her I wasn't impressed with being told about my mothering skills, told her that really cut to the bone, hurt my feelings. I told her I was going to try harder, after all we all have to live under this roof.... but some time we will say our goodbyes (may throw a party) and start living our lives in a peaceful tidy home...'ours!'

I work 40 hours a week cleaning at the jail...a job of which I love to do but of course by the time I get home I'm usually pretty much fucked! I don't appreciate coming home to find a sink full of other folks dirty pots piled high in the kitchen sink., let alone try to figure out what I have to start cooking for dinner. I had an idea which I knew would fit perfectly in to place. With calm of voice I 'asked' both of the offspring to help around the house, if they see dirty pots in the sink, wash them for me.... I didn't shout... I figured that if I don't sound angry and raise my voice I'll get a better result. I'm on better talking terms with Laura now, she's 26 on Tuesday. I'm not keeping my fingers crossed for this to work every day but it's a start. My nerves are way better these days... I can still look after myself and won't stand for any crap! This morning Laura , her dad and I went to our local town for a game of Badminton... great fun... it's been at least 10 years since I played it... but it soon came flooding back to me... I beat her 11/2. I beat the hubby 11/6 and several games after that I practiced my back hand... I might not be able to climb/fall/crawl out of my bed in the morning... We have booked another court next Thursday evening...

Wednesday 29 February 2012

Rights







It's looking slightly better for us.


The solicitor explained today that


we have tenants rights.. we have


them by the balls so to speak.


So for now we stay put, we will


not be pushed out of here.. time


for us to ease up, relax some


what. The off spring will have


time to take breath, they can't


find anywhere n say they can't


afford anywhere, I have a two


man tent I can lend them.. but


it doesn't come with a cleaner


nor cook, they'll have to do


their own work when they


leave, but for now we can


all stay pretty much put..


phew.................................!

Friday 24 February 2012

Changes



Home is where the heart is right?

This is where I moved to at the young

age of 22, newly married, with the

thought of living here forever.

This building is over 300 years

old, it has so much character.

Wet rot, dry rot, walls that

aren't straight, decorating

can and has been a nightmare

but that's old properties for

you. My hubby has lived here

for 44 years.. It's going to be

a heart wrenching experience

when we eventually have to move. Don't they say that moving house and divorce

are the two elements that really test your heart strings and nervous system?

I've haven't moved anywhere since getting married, this has been my home

since that special day 29 years ago come September 3rd 1983. I am soon to

re live that when we have to sell half our furniture and down size to our

soon to be new home/rented accommodation. I shall miss the black n white

solid oak beams that support this house, they are a pain to paint... where

we are moving to has very little garden... but it is right next door to a wooded

area. Peace and tranquility is what I'm looking forward to. The fact that the

pain in the arse of a so called neighbour we have in this house who finds it

nothing out of the ordinary to start up his tractor and work at strange hours

of the night... I will not miss him at all. We might be lucky enough to have

deer on our back garden when we move. Also I have to talk to my daughter

at some point/soon, very soon as she is under the assumption that

she is moving in with us......'NOT and NEVER going to HAPPEN!' My very

best of friends has offered to rent her spare room out to her. Put it this way,

that is her only option, she's not in a position to turn it down. So I'm in a

better frame of mind now. My hubby is a lot happier, well we've gone from

his boss tellin him he's got to retire and the worry of losing the roof over

our heads. I think we shall have a big furniture sale, make a visit to the

antique auction rooms and do some car boots + hire a skip. Life's never

what you expect is it. Oh yeah, I also have to sell my piano as we can't

find space for it, I've had it since I was 9. That I will need tissues for!

Wednesday 22 February 2012

Celebrations ...yay !!



My god how times flies.

Another year older yet

not so much wise..

I've seen so many

things in my life.

My love for my

husband grows

and multiplies.,

ten fold. As we

get to that place

where daffodils

smile and reach

for the sky.. I

take a breath

and realise how

wonder my life

is. How I've grown

to endure what

ever life chucks

at me, I've no doubt

been here before.

I've taken a new route

realising that a change

scenery would do me

some good. Tomorrow

I will be '51' smiling

on the inside and

and for once on the

outside too. I got

there, to the

bright golden haze in

the meadow.. happy

I am and Happy

Birthday to me I

shall be tomorrow.

'Yipeeeeeeeeeeee!'

Sunday 19 February 2012

Panic Stations

Well the time has come for us to wake up and smell the coffee.
With another letter from his boss, and a date for another meeting
to discuss his job, our house, his money they haven't paid him..
the time is gettin ever closer to actually take a deep breath and
realise that we may not have a roof over our head for much
longer. We've both lost our appetites. I've got rid of the massive
headache I was carrying around with me last week. I'm sleeping
better but he isn't sleeping much at all. So we are kind of in limbo
right now... not sure what will happen next. The meeting was
originally this coming Thursday but it's now been moved to
this Wednesday as Thursday we're out for the day to celebrate..
like I/we feel like celebrating anything... my 51st Birthday!
We were going to go out on our m'bikes today for a short spin,
my idea was not to right now as he's not sleeping too well, as
you can imagine.. how would you feel if you were about to
not only lose your job but the house that comes with it, your/
our home!! Sick? Angry? Lost? Anxious? Betrayed? Shitty?
But to name but a few words to describe how I feel this
minute. I thought that because his/ our minds weren't on
the now... that riding a m'bike might not be a good thing.
You need to have your heads screwed on for that job, other-
wise you might lose our head/legs/neck/life!!! Our idea was
for him to work at least 3 more years to pay off our debt.
Now we're at that stage where we have to finalise our
finances.... tighten our belts.. he's even asked me should
we need to down load some items, to gain some cash..
would I be prepared to sell my 'Nitebyrd' m'bike? I
said yes but only as a last resort. I don't want to think
that far ahead.... so I'll keep my head up, try to cheer
him up, try to eat some thing and keep smiling, although
I actually feel like smackin his boss until he doesn't
have a heart beat. He's worked for him for almost 44
years. Has about 2 weeks off through accidents that
happened on the farm, he wasn't paid sick pay, his boss
never came to see him, he was only interested in when
he was returning to work (selfish c**t!) So as you can
imagine my hubby is feeling like crap as though
his boss is about to (and I know he will) crap on him.
I won't be moving in a hurry, this is my home, I've
lived here for 29years, he's lived here 44 years.
I want to cry, but I can't, I won't be reduced to
that..... not yet anyway. So roll on Wednesday,
oh yeah and if we go and the so called boss wants
our son out too, then it becomes even more
personal, our son and Daughter live here, they
will have to find other living arrangements, like
they can afford to live anywhere else, but that
will be a welcome wake up call for them, make
them realise at 25 & 26 mummy n daddy can't
clean up after them anymore.. time for them
to wake up and smell the coffee too. I hate
coffee... I much prefer tea!

Monday 13 February 2012

Valentine




Oh Valentine.. I reach out for you,
where? before me, naked... there.
Oh glorious be mine.. drink from
my veins, flourish..all that we can be....
immortal, divine.
Come to me....
For I love you with my
everything

Wednesday 8 February 2012

@&*%~#@#@*&&%^>

OK so some time I write a load of crap.
I have over the years talked a load of
crap... crap is in the air...
I think these meds are eventually
beginning to work...
For once in my pityful life
I've actually come to realise
it is OK to talk crap now
and again... I don't
actually anymore give a
flying crap...CRAP..CRAP
CRAP......CRAP...CRAP..
Got a nice kinda ring
to it don't you
think? Crap Crap Crap
crapity crap. And
this s what I do
alot of these
days is laugh,
laugh at everything
even if it pisses
you off big time, just
fuckin laugh.
;))))))))))))))))))))
)))))))))))))))))))
))))))))))))))))
))))))))))
))))))))
)))))
))))
:)> Indi
and
out. HA!

Sunday 22 January 2012

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Rub~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Pretty little patterns.
Fingers grind against
my lips.. pulsating,
generating heat. My
heart rate increase
as I drag my arse
out of my jeans,
til my bum is
pivoting eagerly
on the edge, legs
wide...steady
feet. Rub,
retract the hood
precision hits
the spot..tingle
breathe faster
with staggered
beats, my clit
swells, the blood
flows through
my veins...
twitch, flick
rub.. I'm
c-c-c-c-comin
AAAAAAAAAGAIN.

Wednesday 18 January 2012

Silver lining.

I found out yesterday that some sad bastard had taken nearly £500 out of my bank account without me knowing...throwing me into over drawn mode of £200. My card I think has been cloned.... some thing that happens to other poor unsuspecting folk like me.. it's a growing industry! Well my bank is on the case and will reimburse my lost funds and cover my daily £10 charge that the lovely bank people like to charge us for the not so nice privilege of being over drawn due to the scummy cretin who helped themselves to my money... it's a good job I never get to be face to face with that scummy cretin 'cuz I can honestly say I'd end up puttin them in A&E!! I work very hard for my wages and don't take to kindly for anyone dipping their hand in.... in some far eastern countries they chop the hand off the thief...... I got a very sharp knife, but in this instance I think I may use a blunt one.... minus the anaesthetic. On the other hand ... now today I received in the post a very nice surprise... I've won £50 on the premium bonds... here is a silver lining after all. That shall go toward my Spanish holiday in May. Can't wait for that one.

Sunday 15 January 2012

Boom

All can be possible.
Possibility is every-
thing. All I have
to do is believe
in me, for I hold
the trigger. I just
need a steady hand,
stay calm, cool and
collected - and like
they say in the movies
the rest is history.
Or in my world 'it's
a piece of cake'!

Saturday 14 January 2012

Ricochet

My limbs begged for forgiveness
as the orgasm ricocheted each
and every sinew in my body.
I lay still, the bed clothes
soaked, sweat stuck in my
nostrils, spent euphoria
dripped like early morning
dew. Glazed..my vision
holding on to the crack
in the corner of the
room. I tried to move,
rope held tight my
grip.. ankles rigid,
flesh torn.. nipples
stiff. I yawn as my
flesh withers against
a cool draft..the door
opens... I close my
eyes... bite my lip..

Saturday 7 January 2012

Deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.

Cherish the past ~


Adorn the present~


Create the future~






Something I read the other day and it's
kind of stuck with me. It all makes for
common sense if you stop to think about
it. Oh 'ad' by the way my 'n' key does't
always work so my words don't always make
the write kid of sense. Just sayin like.

Wednesday 4 January 2012

The future

Last year has been and gone.
Things were said and done..
I can now look for the
future, plan my next move,
but never ever fall in
love. I have a love,
he's the man in my life
and as we said 28 years
ago we do, I did, we
did and still do..love
each other through
and through. I won't
be looking back, it's
been done, whatever
was said I did it, it
was done. Past is
past, I look forward
to the future... so
that is all I have
to say today.. time
out!