Once upon a times

You may be out of reach...touch...we don't, we didn't see eye to eye...
I spat my dummy out called you names...names we won't mention.
I often wonder where we might be now had we not fallen out of love.
Have I made a huge mistake, could we ever try again? I've tried so
many times to see where we/I went wrong. But stubborn as I know
I can be/ have been... I don't have the answers any more. I don't
want your pity... I can't be sorry... I won't apologise..what could
I say that would mean it? I have to let go. Cut the last remaining
thread that held us together... severe the lost feelings.. lose all of
the friendship stuff we shared.... I said I didn't care..... this is so
hard to digest. Folded toilet paper..hidden gems... flowers thrust
in your direction.... nerves flinch, hands shake... write me a letter
with words dipped in gold.... what was I thinking back then? Holy
crap I really must have looked a fool. Erase all that I ever said, I
couldn't have been thinking right... and now..................... we are
dead. Dead from the neck down, my heart that once held you
so tightly... shudders each time I almost....
find myself wondering where we might be now if I hadn't told
you how I felt back then..... now I feel nothing... my every things
have perished.... my heart holds no space for 'once upon a times.'