Thursday, 20 November 2008

Coming Out

There comes a time in every one's life when we all have to do some thing that takes a lot of 'balls.' Last week I did just that I came out to my family!!.................... The most nerve wrecking moment EVER!!!! I had decided what I was going to say... chose my words very carefully..... paced up and down the lounge carpet, palms sweaty. When the actual moment arrived-stuttering....... I opened my mouth.... and nothing came out that made any sense; but after a sharp intake of breath... I started again-and it flowed. My family were quiet, listening as I told them what I had practiced. To my 'amazement' ........... and 'RELIEF'... they had known for quite a long time. I felt like a heavy weight had been lifted from my shoulders. So........ no more pretending, no more excuses as to where I go of an evening or weekend. I can now be 'ME' and the family except me for that. I wish every thing in life could be so easy. I'd wanted to .. on several occasions to say some thing, some how explain why I was going out, where I'd been and who with; but I always thought it was my business and no one Else's. The new love in my life is 'PROUD' of me, but says she couldn't do what I have achieved, not at her place of work or to her family, only to her closest of friends. I too am out at work. Some people criticise me for who I am, they are not my 'true' friends. My real friends support me, listen when I have problems, they do not condone who I am, live and let live is my motto.

8 comments:

Spiky Zora Jones said...

OH sweetie. i am proud of you. It does take a lot to say those fisrt words that seem hard to roll off your tongue...but you did it. yay?

My mother knew when i was young. I told her at 13..almost 14 years old. I dated boys too though but she knew.

sweetie...Jade, see her in my blog roll, she had done the same. It was harder for her. She gets resistance. when you can...can you give her some support. Her mother battles it and jade is such a wonderful person. It hurts my heart to think of how much that hurts her.

You know at my work...some know and some don't and some refuse to believe it. :)

You take care sweetie...I'm proud of you honey...know that.

Ciao babe.

Indigo said...

Hey spiky~ will give my support to Jade. It must be hard for the parents though, thinking they'll never get grand kids.. but I can see both sides of the story, life's a real bitch some times.. thanks hun ~x~

nitebyrd said...

I'm very proud of you! (((HUGS!))) What a relief to finally be who you are to everyone.
You must feel so liberated and free.

Love does magical things.

Indigo said...

Thanks nitebyrd~ Love does !

hornymaleuk said...

Indigo - I recognise the huge amount of courage that you needed to "come out".

Indigo said...

Hornymaleuk~ yeah HUGE!! Glad it's done now... HUGE weight off my shoulders...

Jade said...

wow we've been through a lot of the same stuff in the past month. So glad to hear That it went better than expected. It is such a crazy moment when you realize that you're actually saying the words required to ''come out'' Good for you for being true to yourself!! :-)

Indigo said...

Jade~ life can be painful to every one, it's a pity that in every ones heart there can't be a space for us gay folk, a brain cell that allows the population to express their heart felt appreciation of the way we want to grasp life, and live it the way it chose us to be, to ne happy! But there isn't & they don't have the ability to accept us, they're only human..apparently!