For those of you out there in this big ugly world. Have ever taken the wrong turning? I fell in love.. or though I thought, five years ago. When I first started work where I am now. She was and still is gorgeous, flirtatious, sexy, 100% woman. Over the past few years, we've exchanged friendly womanly banter... until recently! Being the ... " I give everything away " kind of idiot. " Fall in love at the drop of a hat " woman." Lower my barriers at the first sign of what I think is affection." Any of this ring out to any of your women out there or is it just silly 'ol me?
It all started a week prior to Easter week. I was feeling better after my last encounter with fate. To cut a long story short.... I'd decided without a doubt that she was the one for me. I'd had plenty of time to say something to her, but my nerves always got the better of me, so I held back... for a change. You see I am learning... slowly... but surely.... to take each step at a time, never learn to run before you can walk!! OR though I thought!
She said to me... before she left for her few days off... "don't forget my Easter Egg!" So I went and bought her an Easter Egg AND a cute Easter chic. I chose my time when to give them to her, wanting her on my own. Not wanting an audience, to embarrass me for. I lured her into a room. Said I'd got her some thing and produced this egg into her clasp, then the chic followed. I was nervous to say the least, but laughing... along with her out burst of nervous giggles, I managed to survive. She went and ruined it when she said I'd embarrassed her! That was not my intention. My heart sank. I tried to hide my disappointment. She leaned forward to hug me... twice. There was a lot of smiling. To top it all, she said I shouldn't waste my money on her. I wanted to add to that , that she was worth every penny! We left the room , I locked the door and that was that. Until....................... the next day when several people who I know as work associates, mentioned the Easter egg episode to me... I blushed, but managed to hide my embarrassment.. with more silly girlish giggles.
What had I done? Well from any heterosexual's point of view I'd given her this chocolate present with chic. Nothing more, nothing less. But to me, I thought I'd crossed a huge obstacle, in some way of showing my untold affection for her, after so many years of just being this joke in the back ground! Now I get the impression she's trying to avoid me. I also found out that she is not into me, and never will be. But ... she was flirting with me, in a way that any man should she have flirted with them , would by now be thinking the same thing as I, she's interested in them!
How wrong was I? I feel totally deflated. I'm .. not only the butt of every one who's heard of the stupid egg, joke. My body language from now on will be turned down very low. As for hers... she obviously doesn't know where her on .. off switch is.
My self esteem is at an all time low. I think she's trying to avoid me now, which is slightly difficult in the place where we both work. I shall think twice next time some one flirts with me, or shows any genuine signs of affection! End of!!
Saturday, 25 April 2009
Saturday, 18 April 2009
Forgiveness
I was wrong. Forgive me. I have been so self centered of late. My mind... full of other things, things that were not important to you....me! My Ying and Yang have been out of sorts. I have crucified myself thinking I had lost you.
I had arranged to meet you, at your house... I was nervous to say the least. My heart pounded in my chest. My nerves in tatters. What was I going to say to you? I had this speech written, memorised... I read it over and over again. My mouth felt dry. My hands...shaking!
I stood at your door, my hand hovered over the door bell. I took a deep breath. I waited for the inevitable... you took your time to compose your stance. I was a mess, I'd had a few drinks, my head was spinning.
Eventually the door opened. You stood there in all your glory, a diamond! Sparkling and bright. My speech had evaporated into thin air. I stuttered.... I felt so empty. You almost smiled at this pathetic woman standing in the door way." Well " you spoke with strength. I could feel the heat in yours sentence. My voice shaking, tears forming in my eyes. I blinked, a single tear trickled down my cheek. " Well ..... you gonna stand out there all night?" I wiped my feet and came in. Your slammed the door behind you. " BANG. " I jumped as the sound of the door shutting ran through my head.
" Well what do we have here,? I stood so still, glued to the spot. Not sure of what to do next. You came toward me, held your hand at my face, I thought your were going to strike me. But.....
you brought the other hand to my other cheek, clasped your hands around me, and as if in slow motion...planted a sweet tender kiss upon my lips. " I've so missed you.".... tears began to roll down my face, I couldn't control my feelings. We kissed... I kissed you. My tongue delved into your mouth. I tasted the love that had been forgiven. The heat of the moment melted away with all the yesterdays... the nights that I'd lain awake crying... the nights that I'd had nightmares... the thought of ever losing you haunted me. We kissed for all the tomorrows. You took my hand, your fingers platted around my cold hand! You led me upstairs. I wiped away the tears with the back of my hand. I sobbed like a child as you slowly undressed me... and I you. We played with our flesh, you teasing me, and I ... taking you in. In where I left you, before..............
Standing there in your bedroom, the coolness of the night. I shuddered. My nipples standing to attention. Tracing the outline of your face, pulling you into me. Our eyes met, our trance, and with the heat of your breath, I was hooked. You pushed me onto your bed, I lost my balance, you followed. Legs wide, hands forced, I rolled you over, straddled you and held your arms above your head. You did not struggle. You were easy, and wanted the takings. I sunk my lips onto your right nipple... soft then hard, you moaned out loud. Transforming you from this stubborn woman, this hard diamond... I transformed you into a soft kitten, playful. Working my way down to your sex, planting kisses every inch of the way. My face sticky with dried tears. My sobbing... eased. My tears of ...once sadness... now turned to joy. The joy that I have you back. My love... I have you back! Finding your hot hole, eager to suck you.. to place my face between your thighs, to hold your legs apart... You gave no restraint.
Pulling my head up to yours, you bent your head to kiss me, re-assuring me. Then pushing my head back down to this orchid, with it's petals glistening, a pungent perfume, a humming bird tasting its nectar. Tracing the outline of your labia, gently revealing your hidden, and yet slowly swollen clit beneath it's hood. You let out a shudder of delight. Bending your thighs, yanking your knees upwards... easy access to your jewel. Blowing cold air onto your clit, then taking the full length of your sex in my mouth, devouring every juicy inch, burying my tongue as deep into you as I could. Reaching up to tease your breasts. Taking each hardened tit in my fingers, flicking them one after the other, I had you in my grasp. I took a glimpse of your expression, your eyes tightly shut, your face contorted with the heat of what was happening. My tongue ached for your mouth. My fingers ached to be inside your sex. Your hands stretched above your head, in wild abandonment. Throwing your head from side to side as your body began the journey of no return. My tongue quickened, concentrating on your clitoris, the blood swelling, it's size doubling, the force taking hold of your stricken body. " Oh ..... my ...... GOD." Your words sang out, the orgasm like ten thousand volts of electricity thrashing through your veins, faster my tongue works, keeping pace. Faster... my mouth now dripping with your juicy cum... my tongue going crazy. Our bodies glistening with the dew of lovers lost in abandonment... total abandonment. Your breathing has subsided, your legs...exhausted... my tongue sore... I roll over. Now motionless, the night air chilling my skin. I roll over, climb under the sheets, my clit needs fuckin... but I'm exhausted. Bringing my knees up to my chin, clamping my legs together I hold myself, rocking on my hand, soon I am coming, you place one hand on my face then the other one, you pull me into you, holding me, kissing me, my screams of rapture, muffled by our mouths kissing. My body shakes... you hold me in.
I had arranged to meet you, at your house... I was nervous to say the least. My heart pounded in my chest. My nerves in tatters. What was I going to say to you? I had this speech written, memorised... I read it over and over again. My mouth felt dry. My hands...shaking!
I stood at your door, my hand hovered over the door bell. I took a deep breath. I waited for the inevitable... you took your time to compose your stance. I was a mess, I'd had a few drinks, my head was spinning.
Eventually the door opened. You stood there in all your glory, a diamond! Sparkling and bright. My speech had evaporated into thin air. I stuttered.... I felt so empty. You almost smiled at this pathetic woman standing in the door way." Well " you spoke with strength. I could feel the heat in yours sentence. My voice shaking, tears forming in my eyes. I blinked, a single tear trickled down my cheek. " Well ..... you gonna stand out there all night?" I wiped my feet and came in. Your slammed the door behind you. " BANG. " I jumped as the sound of the door shutting ran through my head.
" Well what do we have here,? I stood so still, glued to the spot. Not sure of what to do next. You came toward me, held your hand at my face, I thought your were going to strike me. But.....
you brought the other hand to my other cheek, clasped your hands around me, and as if in slow motion...planted a sweet tender kiss upon my lips. " I've so missed you.".... tears began to roll down my face, I couldn't control my feelings. We kissed... I kissed you. My tongue delved into your mouth. I tasted the love that had been forgiven. The heat of the moment melted away with all the yesterdays... the nights that I'd lain awake crying... the nights that I'd had nightmares... the thought of ever losing you haunted me. We kissed for all the tomorrows. You took my hand, your fingers platted around my cold hand! You led me upstairs. I wiped away the tears with the back of my hand. I sobbed like a child as you slowly undressed me... and I you. We played with our flesh, you teasing me, and I ... taking you in. In where I left you, before..............
Standing there in your bedroom, the coolness of the night. I shuddered. My nipples standing to attention. Tracing the outline of your face, pulling you into me. Our eyes met, our trance, and with the heat of your breath, I was hooked. You pushed me onto your bed, I lost my balance, you followed. Legs wide, hands forced, I rolled you over, straddled you and held your arms above your head. You did not struggle. You were easy, and wanted the takings. I sunk my lips onto your right nipple... soft then hard, you moaned out loud. Transforming you from this stubborn woman, this hard diamond... I transformed you into a soft kitten, playful. Working my way down to your sex, planting kisses every inch of the way. My face sticky with dried tears. My sobbing... eased. My tears of ...once sadness... now turned to joy. The joy that I have you back. My love... I have you back! Finding your hot hole, eager to suck you.. to place my face between your thighs, to hold your legs apart... You gave no restraint.
Pulling my head up to yours, you bent your head to kiss me, re-assuring me. Then pushing my head back down to this orchid, with it's petals glistening, a pungent perfume, a humming bird tasting its nectar. Tracing the outline of your labia, gently revealing your hidden, and yet slowly swollen clit beneath it's hood. You let out a shudder of delight. Bending your thighs, yanking your knees upwards... easy access to your jewel. Blowing cold air onto your clit, then taking the full length of your sex in my mouth, devouring every juicy inch, burying my tongue as deep into you as I could. Reaching up to tease your breasts. Taking each hardened tit in my fingers, flicking them one after the other, I had you in my grasp. I took a glimpse of your expression, your eyes tightly shut, your face contorted with the heat of what was happening. My tongue ached for your mouth. My fingers ached to be inside your sex. Your hands stretched above your head, in wild abandonment. Throwing your head from side to side as your body began the journey of no return. My tongue quickened, concentrating on your clitoris, the blood swelling, it's size doubling, the force taking hold of your stricken body. " Oh ..... my ...... GOD." Your words sang out, the orgasm like ten thousand volts of electricity thrashing through your veins, faster my tongue works, keeping pace. Faster... my mouth now dripping with your juicy cum... my tongue going crazy. Our bodies glistening with the dew of lovers lost in abandonment... total abandonment. Your breathing has subsided, your legs...exhausted... my tongue sore... I roll over. Now motionless, the night air chilling my skin. I roll over, climb under the sheets, my clit needs fuckin... but I'm exhausted. Bringing my knees up to my chin, clamping my legs together I hold myself, rocking on my hand, soon I am coming, you place one hand on my face then the other one, you pull me into you, holding me, kissing me, my screams of rapture, muffled by our mouths kissing. My body shakes... you hold me in.
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