Used to be

I used to have a little pink nipple,
the picture to my blog, but things
are just starting to change..so bare
with me...have a heart. I'm in the
middle of changin the way I get
things done.. photos and the
such are on my list of items
to get done. I'm not ready
to return just yet.. I do
what I do for me.. this
world of mine has changed
as I have recovered and
yet discovered what actually
makes me tick, so I won't
be back for a while longer,
I have things not yet
started, articles of life
that so often we take
for granted..blah blah
blah. That's all for
now folks, goodbye.

Enough for now ........

Savvy has given me this idea, the one I'm about to tell you about. That as we go through life, doing different activities, working full time-trying to enjoy our free time and believe me my weekends fly by.. I've decided to bow out of blogging for a while, until I'm ready to come back.. I've exhausted my ideas for writing anything that remotely involves my brain and heart in the same context. I'm going through a process at the moment that I'm not even sure about myself. I'm tired alot more.. I work bloody hard.. exercise is taking shape as too are my joints which tend to ache more. X-rays n physio for this n that. Trying to piece together sentences that I'm happy with. I'm bored with the Internet right now. I've fed up of trying to make people laugh, I haven't laughed in a while actually.. is it the weather? The world is pretty crap right now...right? God help the folk in Japan, I some times think that it .. these disasters have nowt to do with the shape of the planet.. is it God keeping tabs on how many folk actually live on this vast place called earth?! Does HE God cull us every now and again or is there such a person called God? Do I really believe in him any more? All these tedious boring questions.. I can honestly say hand on heart I've had enough of typing silly words on this pathetic keyboard. So I'm not coming by for a while... however long that might be... I am as of now...
not here. So until the day I return....if I do decide to come back...Adios.xxx

I believe I can fly

This was the Birthday Surprise my husband had planned for me three weeks ago. Originally to be had the week before my big day, due to crap weather conditions it had been cancelled three times. I found out yesterday what I was in for, but after the said phone call the rain came down slowly at first then pretty rapidly, this isn't great conditions for the helicopter ride and besides if the weather's bad, the visibility is poor. So today was the day I was to eventually experience my first ride in a helicopter, and I couldn't wait either. The weather was really good, visibility very good. I'm glad I waited this long, if it's worth doing good, it's worth doing very good. After the initial chat on ground about safety procedures and how to enter and leave the chopper... it was my turn to experience my ride, I'd been waiting for this for over three weeks so I was very excited and also very nervous..
It looked so tiny compared to full size helicopters I'd seen.. My perception of height and speed changed today. With surround visual effects, and just the two of us between the ground and God... I have to admit I did feel safe. We did the fair ground roll, I think I let out a small scream....of delight at that point. After a short re run of the controls and which did what I was asked if I would like the controls to fly it myself.. at which point I said 'Yes please!' So for roughly eight minutes possibly ten minutes I flew this helicopter all by myself. I was nervous but so glad I did it. Motorbikes~cars~now helicopters...what next I wonder? Tanks? I have a certificate to prove I did fly and on camcorder me in the air... All I need to do now is win the lottery and take it up as a new hobby? Maybe in my dreams, but I'd always dreamt of riding in a helicopter, today that dream came true... I'd never of believed I'd actually fly one.. on my own!! 'WOW' 'WOW' and double 'WOW WOW.'

Daddy Dear

Dads n Daughters..
thicker than blood.
She does stuff for
him, like no other
person would... I
do my fair share,
plus of hell of
a lot.. he bends
over backwards,
of course he does.
She's 25 tomorrow,
she's takin him
out for lunch on
Monday.. for me?
She never does
any of the above.
How do I feel that
she has this close
ness with him? It's
good that they get
on...... He doesn't
always get it right,
like forgettin to
put her uniform
in the dryer..
she swore a him for
that. He forgot her
prescription not
once but twice.
I however did
not forget..a
'cheers' is
all I got in
return, her
words not mine.
I have a son too,
such differences
they have. I'm
not fighting
for their
affection..I
just find
it hard some
times when
she takes
him out with
out me.

Concert Pianist

Having had several months of pain in my thumb joint
I decided to go see the Doc, figure out what might
be causing this *feels like I've hit it with a meat
cleaver* feeling! I made the appointment, went last
night after work.. Dr. Mitchell is very nice, his
bed side manner isn't cold like some doctors I've
had the pleasure of.. there's this one doctor who I
cannot stand, and under any circumstances will not
see... even if I do feel like I am dying.. he's a
no...no. Dr. Mitchell held my fingers, asked me
several questions.. the usual stuff, how long
have I suffered with this pain? Can I do every
day stuff... I tried to peel potatoes last
night with my left hand... quite surprised
I still had all my fingers at the end of it.
Ever had hot aches when your hands get so
cold, then the circulation kicks in.. it hurts
right? This usually happens first thing in the
morning. Throbbing painful fingers and joints.
The doc tell me it's possible Ostio Arthritis.
He drew me a small diagram but to get a better
idea I have booked myself an appointment at
the Hospital tomorrow at 4.05pm, for an X ray.
I don't think there is much I can do, they can do
for the swelling on the joint. Pain killers?
He thought it might have been my Carpal
tunnel.. in which case he had suggested
steroid injections... I have to admit
that when he applied pressure in that area
it hurt... but not enough apparently..phew!
Judging by the shape of my hands now, it's
not going to get any better.. Knobbly
fingers.. knobbly fingers are what I have.
Used to, as a child play the piano.. I
often wonder if I had stuck at it, become
a concert pianist, would I now be in pain?
Do concert pianists get knobbly fingers? Like
ballerinas... do they -well yes they do have
awful feet.. so for me to ask if they suffer
then yes they do. Imagine if you did ballet,
having to put shoes on every day that felt
like you had stones in them..... It will
be interesting to actually see my thumb
bones on screen.. see where we go from there.

Tumble

Tumble with me upon these wooden planks,
glide with me, feel the rhythm.. eat with
me.. come take my hand, fall closely by
hold tight your grip, waist sways in
the bubbling moonlight. Starry sky,
littered with a million diamonds
light our steps with airs and grace.
Come dance with me, come tumble
beneath the heavens. Posture is
every thing. Breathe with me,
feel the heat of our bodies..
devour the music...resume your
stance, come dance with me..